I Never Really Liked The Rain
by ReversedSam
Summary: Why does Sara hate the rain? Femmeslash, don't read if it ain't your thing.


**Disclaimers: They're not mine, but I promise I'll have them back by  
midnight.**

A/N: All mistakes and British spellings are mine.

**A/N: I was challenged, this is the result.**

**I Never Really Liked The Rain**

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Sara had never liked the rain, it had always made her feel cold inside, even as a child, then it was simple though; she'd crawl under the covers in her bed till it went away. As an adult the rain affected her the same way, she had just realised crawling into bed wouldn't fix the problem any more. 

She had no idea how long she'd been walking, she'd left Catherine's in a hurry, she wasn't even sure where she was, not having taken any notice of where her feet were taking her.

The heavy rain had soaked her through, her drenched clothes were clinging to her, giving her goose bumps and she was just now beginning to realise she was cold, freezing in fact. She couldn't bring herself to care though, she felt cold inside, cold and numb and it had nothing to do with the rain this time. She thought the weather was fitting for her mood anyway.

Her mind kept flashing back to the argument she'd had with Catherine that had led her to her current situation.

"I can't believe you think I was flirting with him."

"Well if you weren't you were doing an excellent impersonation of it."

She'd taken Catherine out on the extremely rare occasion they both had the same night off. They'd had dinner and decided to try a new club that had just opened; she'd always loved watching her girlfriend getting lost in the music. She retreated into her own little world where nothing else existed but the beat she was dancing to. After a while she'd change her focus to Sara, drawing her in, bringing her along for the ride. Sara always loved that moment, she felt as though she was sharing in something special, not because of the dancing, but because this was obviously something her girlfriend loved and she wanted to share it with Sara.

Everything had been fine until they had bumped into one of Catherine's ex's, he had insisted on buying them a drink, then proceeded to all but ignore Sara while flirting with Catherine. Sara had felt mild irritation at the intrusion; it soon grew to anger as she watched her girlfriend flirting back. She felt her blood start boiling, what in the hell did she think she was playing at?

She'd been unusually quiet on the ride back to Catherine's, something Catherine had picked up on immediately. She'd tried to ignore it but after a few failed attempts at starting a conversation she had asked what was wrong.

Sara had known she should have gone home. She'd known that if asked, she'd tell Catherine what was bothering her. One thing she'd promised herself she'd never do was lie to Catherine, not after hearing the number of people that had done that to her in the past.

"I was not flirting; I was being nice to him."

"Come off it, it was clear he thought you were planning on being a whole different kind of nice."

"Well that's his problem, why would I flirt with him? You were standing less than two feet away."

"Oh so if I hadn't of been there it would be okay? Maybe you should give him a call, I'm sure he'd come over if you asked. It seems you wish you'd have gone home with him tonight."

"Stop twisting my words, you know damn well what I meant, but I'll clarify anyway shall I? Why would I want to flirt with him or anyone else for that matter when I have you? I don't want anyone else."

"Well you sure as hell don't give that impression. I'm sick to death of watching you flirt with every attractive man you meet, then you come home and sleep with me. How do I know it's not them you're thinking of? I mean, I'm the first woman you've been with, how am I supposed to know I wasn't just some experiment, see what it was like, now the results are in and you're looking for something new. Maybe that's why you throw yourself at every guy you see." She knew that was out of line, that she shouldn't have said it but she was to stubborn to apologize, especially during an argument.

She watched as the fight seemed to drain from Catherine as she sighed and slumped down to the sofa, her gaze turned towards Sara, there were tears in her eyes when she spoke.

"I don't think I can do this any more, I can't help who I am and how I am with people, and I'm not prepared to change for anyone, including you. How many times must we have this fight? I think it's best if we stop seeing each other."

Sara felt the words like a kick in the stomach; they had the same affect, sapping the wind from her body, rendering her immobile. She felt her whole world falling down around her and she felt totally helpless to stop it.

"Catherine..." Was the best she could do as she felt the tears start to run down her cheeks.

"No Sara. I've tried so hard to help you get over your insecurities and see that it's you I want but it seems no matter what I do it always comes back to this and I just can't do it any more. I love you with all my heart and I want to be with you so much but it's just not enough any more. I can't keep fighting you all the time, it hurts too much."

Sara hadn't even tried to protest, her voice wouldn't have worked anyway. She just turned and left. Her heart breaking as she closed the door behind herself.

She wasn't sure how long ago that was; it was irrelevant now anyway, everything was irrelevant without Catherine.

She looked at the next street sign she came across, noting she was only a mile or so from her apartment, she decided to head home and then maybe she would sleep. At least then, in the unconsciousness of sleep she wouldn't feel the way she did now. She'd have a small reprieve before the alarm clock declared the start of another day.

Having nothing but her mind to keep her company on her walk Sara had gone over the argument and what had caused it over and over again. Catherine had been right, it was her own insecurities that had made her react the way she had, sometimes she had a hard time believing somebody as amazing as Catherine wanted her. But instead of dealing with her own issues, working with Catherine to try to overcome them, she lashed out, trying to give Catherine the reason to break things off, having convinced herself that's what the other woman wanted.

It seems she got her wish tonight.

Thinking back to the interaction between Catherine and her ex she had come to realise she was acting no different with him than she did with Nick and Warrick. But as usual, Sara had been looking for an excuse, seeing things that weren't there. Because it was easier to believe that someone like Catherine was only with her till she got a better offer that it was to believe she wanted her and her alone.

She'd have to move, there's no way she could work with Catherine now. Be around her every day and not be with her, it had been hard enough beforehand, trying to hide her feelings, now it would be impossible.

She had managed to totally ruin her life within the space of an hour and she had nothing and nobody to blame but herself.

She looked up when she reached the street her apartment block was on, not sure whether she wanted to go inside. At least when she walked she could find a distraction occasionally, this was Vegas after all. But if she went inside, there would be nothing, nothing at all distracting her from her thoughts, from the million different emotions currently turning her stomach upside down.

But the thought of sleep won out. She was both physically and emotionally exhausted, not to mention it was still raining.

For a second, as she reached her apartment block she though she saw Catherine's car, shaking her head to clear the image she carried on walking. Was this the way it would be from now on? Seeing Catherine everywhere she went.

"SARA!"

Turning to see who it was Sara froze as she saw Catherine running towards her.

Catherine had been sitting in her car outside Sara's apartment building for hours. She'd wanted to take back her words the moment she'd said them but Sara hadn't given her the chance.

She'd just been so tired of having the same fight over and over again. But she hadn't meant it, how could she? She loved Sara with everything she was. She'd waited so long to be with her and had been happier than she thought possible once she was.

After an hour or so she'd started to worry, Sara had no coat and therefore no phone in case anything had gone wrong. It was clear she hadn't gotten a cab, but had walked instead. So when Catherine had seen the soaked figure of her girlfriend approaching the relief had been immense, she'd never have forgiven herself had anything happened.

She ran towards the soaked woman determined to make her see she was the only one for her.

Sara stood motionless as Catherine's reached her, she still didn't move when she felt Catherine throw her arms around her neck and placed tiny kisses over her soaked face. She thought the kisses were raindrops at first, they were so soft.

She felt Catherine's hands as they came up to cup her face. The heat of them felt strange against her cold skin but she craved the comfort they brought.

"I'm so sorry baby, I didn't mean it. How could I have? I love you so much. I couldn't function without you."

Catherine almost didn't recognise her own voice, it sounded desperate and frantic, she didn't care, she just needed to make Sara see how sorry she was, needed her to see they belonged together.

Sara still hadn't moved, she couldn't believe she was being offered another chance, after all the mistakes she'd made, all the fights she'd started for no reason, Catherine still wanted her.

"Sara, speak to me, say something, anything, just speak to me please."

"I love you." She wanted to say so much more. She wanted to tell her how stupid she'd been, how much she regretted her actions but right now the words wouldn't come.

"I love you too baby, so much."

"I'm sorry, I acted like an idiot, I know you didn't do anything wrong, I just worry so much about losing you."

"You shouldn't, you're it for me and you're all I wanted for so long. Now I have you, I'd never do anything to lose you."

Sara couldn't respond. Words failed her again, the emotions running through her momentarily overwhelming her so she did the only thing she could think to do. She pulled Catherine into her arms wrapping them around her and clung on for dear life.

She wasn't sure how long she stood there, holding on to Sara, she was just happy to have been given another chance, to not have been turned away.

"We need to get inside, you're freezing." Sara heard the words and felt Catherine pull away; she frantically reached for the offered hand, needing some form of contact, something to reassure her that this was real.

She wordlessly let herself be led inside; she would have followed the woman in front of her anywhere right now.

An hour later when they crawled into bed, Sara had still yet to let go of Catherine, constantly feeling the need for some form of contact. She pulled Catherine to her as soon as they were both comfortable and sighed contentedly. She knew they still had to talk, but they were together, that's all that mattered right now.

"Do you remember our first kiss?"

Sara nodded, of course she did, how could she forget something like that? "Outside the lab, in the pouring rain, I don't even know why I did it; I just knew I had to."

She pulled Sara closer before replying. "I thought it was so romantic." She grinned at the memory, her initial shock at being kissed almost immediately giving way to the elation at the new possibilities it held.

"I knew then and there that you were the one and that I wanted to spend the rest of my life with you."

Sara felt her heart jump at the words, her world had slowly started to right itself when Catherine shouted her outside, now the process was being helped along.

"Move in with me?"

Raising her head, seeing nothing but love in Catherine's eyes. Once again words failed her as emotions overwhelmed her. She simply nodded and brought their lips together for a soft kiss, hoping to convey everything she was feeling.

Catherine hadn't realised she'd been holding her breath until she felt it escape at Sara's reply. She finally had it, the family she had always wanted. "Thank you." She whispered, not quite sure if it was directed at Sara or whatever god had given her this opportunity at happiness.

Sara placed her head back on Catherine's shoulder and listened to her breath even out as she fell asleep. Thanks to the woman beside her she knew that from now on, now matter how hard it rained, she'd never feel cold again.

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**Thanks for reading.**

**Reviews are gratefully received. **


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